Wednesday, April 28, 2004

Remembered something that happened to me many years back. I was a new leader in the Youth ministry in the church. Happily, I was led by God to pioneer some schools in the East part of Singapore. When I was really fervent to reach out to the students who are lost spiritually, something happened. I was preparing to lead a CG that day when some of the gals in my group were there early with me. While talking to one of the girls, we were joking and laughing away when suddenly, one of the gals sudeenly slapped me on the right cheek of my face, which the other gals and myself was shocked. Can't remember why she slapped me but the rest actually scolded her for doing that to me. Well, I kept saying, "It's ok, it's ok", but the gals kept consoling me. But my heart was broken deep inside. Perhaps, it was really hurting till that point of time. But I really didn't hold anything against that gal at any point in time. My heart now for this gal is the same old thing, hope that she'll find Jesus again. :) cheers in Christ.

Friday, April 23, 2004

23 April 2004, Friday

It is Friday, the DAY of the weekdays!! Finally managed to sit down in my desk and rested for the first half of the day. I’m so happy but also feel a bit down too. In my heart, it seems that there is no sense of fulfillment and satisfaction in my life. Well, I think I shouldn’t complain so much about my situation now but to practice 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18.
Anyway, this is the second week for my job and I am getting a bit more occupied than the first week. J Glad to have more things to do now. Frankly speaking, it is starting to be quite physically tiring for me. I was practically running around 6 stores yesterday for the entire day. My legs were numb and sore… Can’t think of any other thing but only on how to rest my legs and my body. While going around yesterday, I was having a slight headache. But later on in the afternoon, it began to get worse. The weather was unpredictable. It was very sunny in the afternoon, and then it starts to drizzle. Well, the lazy me didn’t bring my umbrella out, thus I was caught in the drizzle. Thankfully, it wasn’t for too long and the rain stopped. Praise God!! But my headache didn’t go away at all. I was about to surrender at my second last stop, but I have decided to go all out for the last one. And I did it. Finished everything at 5.30pm and it is knock off time!!

Went straight to Bugis for a short while as I’ve decided to give myself a short relaxing break before I meet my sheep. Well, the one-hour break really did help a bit. I managed to relax a bit and my headache began to subside for a while. Well, all in all, I managed to regain my alertness for shepherding at least. Thank God that I didn’t give sub-standard food to my sheep.

After shepherding session, I went to meet Alex at his office for P&W practice. It was surprising. Met my marketing junior at his workplace. And that gal was the one that got selected together with Alex for the training position. She was 2 years my junior. Remembered that I’ve attended her class for one of the year 1 modules because I have to differ some modules. When I went to her class, her class was indeed a culture shocked one for me. It’s really so “ang mo pai” man. Anyway, put this thing aside. The P&W practice was really a great one. Though got a few interruptions by Alex’s colleagues. They are really fun and nice. Hmm no wonder Alex don’t want to go home hor…. haha (just joking!!)

Jokes aside…. Anyway for the past few days, I’ve been trying to know what’s happening at Nicoll Highway, one road that I used to travel past a lot. I feel sad… not for the road but for the injured workers and casualties and their families. I feel so sorry for them. In fact, I just cannot imagine how terrible it will be to be trapped in rubbles and mud. Just like the 911 incident, it makes me think that life is always so fragile.

Wednesday, April 21, 2004

Have been running around all the supermarkets to do store surveys and checks. Quite tiring for me. So far working there is fun cos time flies and no OT is required. People are nice and young especially... but definitely only my dept's pple are young cos others are all pretty senior u know. But it has been good so far. Pretty glad to have such a job.

Well, two of my poly friends went for their second interview today. Hope that they will get it so that I'll have two more colleagues that I am familiar with. Hee... anyway church camp is coming in June. Excitng man... I'll take leave and go for it!!! Yeah!!

Sunday, April 18, 2004

Today's church service was great. Learnt about why people don't believe the Lord even though there are so many many proofs about Jesus's ressurection, his reality. Perhaps, it is just the sophisticated life that many are living today. Why they don't believe? Because "Doubt is an intellectual problem; many want to believe but they struggle with questions in mind. But unbelief is a moral problem." Perhaps understand this fact - "God does not want us to submit our faith to Him without reason but the very limits of our reason makes faith a necessity."

Perhaps you might think that I'm preaching to you again. But come to think about it, if God is not real, then why are the many out there turning to Him today? Isn't it true that we should check out the very reality of God in our lives today? Give Jesus a chance to prove His reality in your life and not let the chance of salvation pass by you today.

My very own personal testimony. hope that it touches your heart:

I was Sec 1 then. I didn't believe in the reality of God because I think church is always a place where rich people go to, have to "donate" money and where prayers are made. I didn't like Christians as they like to grab u off the streets to preach to you the gospel and "force" you to become a Christian by saying the "so-called" Sinner's prayer.
Then, there was this particular morning that I was supposed to go for my Netball session as usual during one of the weekday mornings. Then I was crossing the road at the traffic junction. It was green man crossing and I was about to reach the part where vehicles and buses have to stop while I continue crossing. Suddenly, this bus came and I thought that it will stop but it didn't. I did not even stop crossing then. But out of no where, I felt that there was this force that pulled me back from the bus, one and a half steps away. I was stunned. Then, the bus driver stopped after realising that he almost knocked me down. He kept apologising to me. I said, "It's ok" (cos I'm too shocked to say anything else.)
After the bus went off I continued to complete this crossing of the road. When I looked back, I realised that there's this church behind me. It was the "Ang Mo Kio Methodist Church". Nope not that the church saved me. But it's the God of the church that pulled me out of this danger. Frankly speaking, at that point, I know that God saved me. And i made this prayer in my heart, "God thanks for saving me." But I didn't receive Jesus there and then. I continued to have fun in my secondary school life but that didn't help me to experience true love and friendships in life. I was happy but it was only temporary. I have lots of friends but no one can really be a friend that I can truely trust at all.
Shortly after two years, when I was Sec 3, I finally received Him as my Lord and Saviour. I recognised that there are many situations in my life that is beyond my control. eg. my job search, family financial situation, my health condition, my life etc.... I can only say that I need to believe in One that is greater than me. One who hears my prayers and one that loves me without any fault finding. His grace is abundant for me.

Well, I did not change overnight but gradually, as I realised my weaknesses in my life day by day. My rebellious spirit, my stubborness in my ways, the disrespectful manners towards my parents and seniors and the way I treated my peers in school disappeared gradually. I began to find joy and true love in friendships in my life. I bring my friends to church and activities not because I want them to know more people nor to find better life partners for themselves. I want them to experience the love that Jesus shown me before and even at this very point in time and forevermore. Most importantly, I treasure the friendships and would want them to spend life eternally with me.

Friends, classmates and buddies.... I love you guys. Whether you are a Christian anot, I wish and I hope that Jesus would somehow touch your heart. Once again, I plead and beg of you, "Give Jesus a chance." He is good.

With lots of sincerity and earnest prayers for my friends,
Yanyan aka Tricia

Thought of the day

Nope. There's no quotes from me this time. No super duper statements. Just my thought. I thought I am really good but recently I realised that I simply am not. Realised that my thoughts of the negative side always overwhelmed me when there are thousands and thousands of good ones in mind. Rushing here and there, thinking that no friend cares to understand, but indeed there are many who still remembers me in their hearts. They don't call or sms me doesn't mean that they remember me in their hearts. In fact, my Lord remembers me but do I remember Him at all times? That's another pondering question for me. I missed many... ... ... many, many, many... countless people... People that have went through my life's stages, at any one point in my life. Primary schoolmates, secondary school friends, my TK and TKG gals, Temesak secondary (the school that I went almost crazy for), Dunman High, VS, RI, Chung Cheng, Broadrick, Gan Eng Seng... etc... Many schools that I've pioneered and many people that I've seen... many with tears and efforts... I remember them but I don't know how are they doing at this moment. Hope that they are still with the Lord. My sheep, grand-sheep and great-grand sheep... Geok Eng, Jialin, Khim Kieng, Isabel, Crystal, Xiaowoon, Faith, Sally, Adelene, Sylvia, Junxi, Melanie, Meijuan, Anna, Jack, Winston, John, Yiwen, Tian En, Yi Siang, Lloyd, Camy, etc.... ... so many of them... takes months for me to mention name by name... haha... Thanks for making my life even more colourful... sheeps (",)

Wednesday, April 14, 2004

..Watch The Lamb ..
Ray Boltz

Walking On the Road
To Jerusalem,
The time had come to sacrifice,
My two small sons,
They walked beside me down the road,
The reason that they came,
Was to watch the lamb...
And they said,
"Daddy daddy,
What will we see there,
There's so much that we don't understand,"
So I told them of Moses,
And Father Abraham,
And I said dear children,
"Watch the lamb....
There will be so many,
In Jerusalem today,
We must be sure this little lamb,
Doesn't run away,"
And I told them of Moses,
And Father Abraham,
And I said "Dear children,
Watch the lamb...."
When we reached the city,
I knew something must be wrong,
There were no joyful worshippers there,
No joyful worship songs,
And I stood there,
With my children,
In the midst of angry men,
Then I heard a crowd cry out,
"Let's Crucify Him!"
We tried to leave the city,
But we could not get away,
Forced to play in this drama,
A part i did not want to play,
Why upon this day were men condemned to die,
Why were we standing right here,
Where soon they would pass by,
I looked and I said,
"Even now they come,"
The first one cried for mercy,
The people gave him none,
The second one was violent,
He was arrogant and loud,
I can still hear his angry voice,
Screaming at the crowd,
Then someone said,
"There's Jesus,"
I scarce believed my eyes,
A man so badly beaten,
He barely looked alive,
Blood poured from His body,
From the thorns on His brow,
Running down the cross,
And falling to the ground,
I watched as He struggled,
And I watched Him when He fell,
The cross came down upon His back,
And the crowd began to yell,
In that moment I felt such agony,
In that moment I felt such loss,
Till the roman soldier grabbed my arm and screamed,
"YOU! Carry his cro-----------ss!"
At first I tried to resist him,
But his hand reached for his sword,
So I knelt and I took
The cross from the Lord
I put it on my shoulders
We started down the street
And the blood that He'd been shedding,
Was running down my cheeck...
They led us to Golgatha
They drove nails,
Deep in His feet and hands,
And on the cross,
I heard him pray,
"Father, forgive them..."
Never have I seen such love
In any other eyes
"Into thy hands I commit my spirit,"
He prayed,
And then He died.
I stood for what seemed like years,
I lost all sense of time,
Then I felt two tiny hands
Holding tight to mine
My children stood there weeping,
And I heard the oldest say
"Father please forgive us,
The lamb,
Ran away...
Daddy daddy,
What've we seen here,
There's so much that we don't understand,"
So I took them in my arms,
We turned and faced the cross
And I said
"Dear children
Watch the----- la-----mb..."

got this from babysakura... ( hope that she didn't copyright it... hee)

New Job ~ New People ~ New Beginning

Yes... must be wondering why I didn't blog recently right? I'm kind of busy as I have just started my new job. On Monday I've reported my work at the training institute and went through a one day training and orientation programme. Got to know new friends during the orientation as there are many who will soon be trained as cashiers and retail assistants. They are not very educated... most are N or O level graduates. But I feel that they are all simple people living simple lives. That is what I find special about them. After a day's training, we managed to finish the training at 5.05pm. Hee leaving earlier than the usual 5.35pm. :) God is so nice....

Day two... started my work in the office. Couldn't sleep cos I'm too afriad that I will be late. So much so that I woke up at 6.30am. Madness... I took bus from Yishun to my office... but ended up I alighted at the wrong bus-stop along Upper Thomson Rd. Then I was panicking cos I will be late soon. Then at the forresty place, I doubt there will be cab. But God blessed me... after flagging for three times, finally a comfort cab came. Haha... then hor... when I boarded the cab, the cab driver ask me,"here got apartment meh? How come u flag for cab here??" I was so pai seh cos he suaned me. Haha hmm I told him that I alighted at the wrong bus-stop mar.... keke
anyway, I met my two friendly colleagues and my boss. They are so fun that I can't believe my ears and eyes. Hmm they are really nice and friendly. My boss is approachable and he takes care of the two girls very well. As for the rest from the Public Affairs dept they are not as friendly but maybe after sometime, things will change as I get to know then better. Well, so far not much things to do yet but I know it is going to be fun. Tell u more about how God blessed me with this job next time. I'm tired... need to prepare for CG... Take care and see you guys!!

PS: Jona I've updated myself in the blog as requested.... happy liao hor?? Hehe

Saturday, April 10, 2004

Oh yar... my latest pics uploaded.

Good Friday - A Time to Remember

Yesterday was a great time of fun and love that we had together. It was really a time to reflect on God's love given to us. After watching Passion for 3 times, the impact on me is even greater. Definitely, this is not the first time I see this scene of the cross in my life, cos I've ever imagined how painful it is to be cruxified on the cross. The scene, the picture and the pain. But for sure, I can never identify with the Lord Jesus as I have never been up there before. I'm glad that I've brought two of my ex-poly classmates to the movie. One is kinda skeptical but the other was full of questions and curosity. I'm very glad that at least they have heard and know what the gospel is all about. In fact, I pray that both of them will really come to know the Lord soon.

Talking about the Good Friday party yesterday, James brought two pre-believers, Terence and Grace. They came for a few of our activities before. Can see that they enjoyed themselves. We had a great time of food, laughter and games. Played two games in all.... haha but I shan't describe the games... haha or else u will be stumbled.... keke. Well, I should say that all in all, we had fun!! But the most touching part is when we celebrated Bee Nah's birthday.... It was really touching when we affirmed her. I could almost see that her eyes were red... and she almost cried... maybe a bit more of touching statements will make a difference hehe. Anyway I'm really tired at this point. I better go and sleep before I have no more chance to rest more... My work is coming on Monday already. God blessed all of you!!!

Love and Praises to the Most High God,

Monday, April 05, 2004

Certificates Printer

Yes. That's what I am called for the day - A certificate printer. Well, I'm kind of bored as I typed this entry. The printer is very very slow. Taking its own sweet time to churn the certificates piece by piece. Well, I've another 2 classes of certificates to print. Wonder how did Josherine spent her 2 hours plus here, with the rate of speed that they have here with the printers.
Well, I've went ot NTUC today to sign my appointment letter this morning. Well, everything seems good so far. Nothing to complain except maybe that I will only have 9 days of annual leave for my first year of work with them. Hmm but nothing much to complain cos they are giving us another 2 more days to spend with our families' birthday or whatever community work that I have to do. Nice ya. Anyway I'm looking forward to starting the new job. :)

Sunday, April 04, 2004

Sleepy-headed.... had a long day in church. But it was a fruitful day. Did sound for 2 services. Was kind of confused especially when everyone is requesting for things from me!! Argh!!! Nearly pulled my hair on the spot. Haha ... but well, God's grace brought me through. Well, spent sometime having dinner with the twins and jx just now. Very fun to spend time with them. Keke.... well....Anyway, I'm signing my appointment letter tomorrow. So glad. Need to rest early so that I can wake up tomorrow. Anyway after signing my appointment letter, I'll go home. Hehe tired siah.... need to plan some stuff.

Good Friday is coming... so how are u spending it? What's your understanding of Good Friday then?? Hee....

Thursday, April 01, 2004

Yup. Morning I woke up in fluster. I knew that I have to go for the NTUC interview but I kept procrastinating - from 7.50am to 8.15am. Then I finally won the bed monster. I struggled but I got out of my bed eventually. Quickly, I washed up, bathed, changed and put on a light make up so that I won't look that bad for the second interview after all. Then at the back of my mind, I knew that I have to photocopy my 'O' level certificate. So after preparation, I grabbed my stuff and quickly rush out of house to look for the nearest photocopier machine in my neighbourhood area. But in the end, to my disappointment I couldn't find any one at all as all the shops are not even opened at all. Well, at that time I know that I'm getting late already. So I went to the road, looking about to fetch a cab. No cabs and it's already 9.20am. Well, my interview is at 9.45am you know. Well, I started praying and asking God to help. Waited and waited, still no cabs. But just as I was about to call for a cab, a comfort taxi came along and I boarded the cab. Hee!! Praise the Lord, He answers at the right time.

When the cab reached NTUC Fairprice HQ, I went to the reception and asked for the HR personnel. Then after that, I saw one of the candidates that I saw last Thursday during the first round of interview. She's selected for the second round of interview too. Well, in my heart I was really thinking, "Oh no... another tough competitor. She speaks real well, you know." But I made up my mind, walk over and say Hi, so to make one more friend than one more enemy. So we managed to talk and discuss about our first assessment that we had last week. When I was about to ask what she's doing currently, the HR personnel called her in for the interview. Well, then I could only sit there and wait for my turn. While waiting, I saw a very familiar face. She's my ex-poly Marketing coursemate. She was coming as a supplier for Wella products, together with her boss. Well, we don't really communicate much during our poly days as she has her own clique of friends and same goes for me. But before I was called in for interview, I asked her for an exchange of contact numbers. She has matured and became more friendly than last time.

After conversing for a while, the HR personnel asked me in for the interview. So I became nervous again. But my heart was really full of faith as I know that God will see me thru and the Holy Spirit will guide me in what I say. So when I saw the interviewers, they were both the ones that assessed me last thursday. I greeted both, and shaked their hands. Upon sitting down, I smiled and I looked into both of their eyes. First question: " Can you please tell me more about yourself?" So I replied by saying that I can break ice with strangers easily and have no problem meeting up with people... bla bla bla... The he posted a second question, "So what are you doing right now?" I was like stunned for a short 3 seconds then I began to say that I'm not working now and I've been looking around for jobs and even went to a MLM presentation of a company recently. Still open and looking into potential jobs in the market. Well, third question, "So what makes you think that you are suitable for this Customer Relations Officer job?" So I gave them an answer like, "Well, to service customers well is part of the criteria but it is also important that we do not let customers take advantage of the company or even climb over us. But for sure, we should also deal with such customers carefully so that they not bad mouth the company and ruin it's reputation, writing to media and complaining to almost every party that they find possible to do so..." heehee I think they were really stunned at how I answered their questions. Then after that, they asked me if I remembered of my proposal of the Customer relations launch that I answered last week, and they asked me how would I go about launching it... Well, these questions didn't just shocked me but they woke me up. So on and off, answering lots of questions and asking lots of questions it took around 20 to 25 minutes or so. At the end of the interview, I thanked them and they say that they would call me in a week or two's time. So I said this, "Ok. I'll hear from you guys. Hee. Trying to be positive here as I hope." They laughed and the HR personnel sent me to the reception. I turned around and said to her this, "Hey Xiaoyan, thanks. Really thanks a lot once again." I think she thought that I have some question to ask her or something, but never she did expect me to say thanks to her twice. Hee... but frankly speaking there is no spirit of flattery here but purely a heart of thanksgiving and courtesy as well. So I went off with a glad and joyful heart, though I was thinking that 1 to 2 weeks' time of wait can be kind of long.

Then in the afternoon at about 2 plus, I received a call, an unfamiliar number. It was the HR personnel, Xiaoyan. "Hi can I speak to Tricia please? ... This is Xiaoyan from NTUC Fairprice. We would like to offer you the Customer Relations Officer position. Would you like to accept it?" she asked. "Of course. Why not? I'm more than happy to accept it." I answered with so much excitement. Hee.... Everything went on with a surprise element. I was so excited that my voice trembled. She gave me a brief idea of the amount that she is offering me, with allowance as well. I'm really happy about it. From teh application to the two interviews to the offer, every single happening is a God thing. I know that it is a blessed thing because I did ponder for a long while about this job before I sent in my application. And I got it!! Praise the Lord!!

Like what I can always remember, God has never left me without a job for more than a month. And most importantly, He knows that I need it especially for pioneering, I need a job near Yishun. "Lord, it is really You!!" I'll not forget about this blessing that He blessed me with at this point in time. I'll always give u my best as I ought to. Thank you Lord!!