Thursday, August 31, 2006
Went to CG just now. Almost thought that I couldn't make it there. But God is good. I made it there at last. Felt a sense of relieve and comfort when I see my CG mates there. There are so many things to be said but I know that without me saying all these, they will somehow understand me still. It is amazing to be connected by the Holy Spirit. Desmond Law (DL) started off the CG by asking all of us to do a reflection of how the year has been for us so far? What are the goals achieved? Are we closer to fulfilling our resolutions??
I think and think and think... but nothing much came out... but one thing I am very super duper sure... I'm better in controlling my mood swings le. I started this year in a very bad note. But I thank God that Holy Spirit helped me to be firm in letting go of all the negative feelings and mindset, the hurts that I gained and helping me to be firm. If I have not been strong mentally, I think I would have went hay-wire in my emotions, again.
Now, all I ask for is not just to have a strong mind, but also healthy body. I wanna go to North Thailand in Nov, with a good and healthy body. So that the people will not have to take care of me... so that I can take care of myself? haha... I'm still as obstinate as ever... even at times I know I need people to help me, I will still insist to be on my own. That is why a 'strong' girl like me needs to be sensitive at times... cos I always said the wrong words, just because of my 'strong' character. But I am glad of one thing, friends know that I am not that 'strong' and God knows my pretension too. So hor, God is just so amazingly humorous... He has exposed my 'strong character' for a few times liaoz... and He has shown forth this thing in me... I am actually quite weak most of the time...
So why pretend to be strong when I am not?? And why insist that I can do it when I actually can't? haha... silly me!!