Wednesday, December 20, 2006
I've got to know friends around me in a deeper way - no more surface friendships. But also, I have also got to know that no one is perfect. Haha.. you might be wondering why am I saying all this when I have already knew this long time ago. But true enough, I have understood this statement in a clearer manner. No one is perfect. Indeed, someone, everyone or anyone will always try to put up the best front when with people. I know that not everyone does that. But somehow, there is an inclination within human likeness to hide our flaws, hoping that the person sitting or standing next to us will not discover our weaknesses or even so-call the 'darkest secrets'.
I think I won't share my darkest secrets to anyone except to those that I felt close to and I feel that I can entrust my life with. And you might be even more surprised not even my closest ones at home know it. I am truly appreciative of what God has done in my life to place people whom I can trust and entrust my life with. I know that even to the point if I'm called back home one day, my buddies will surely take care of my family members. Friendship, perhaps is just one of the areas that I have discovered more. I've learnt to accept those around me for who they are. And even though I know that some I really hate to accept, God just wants me to learn to do things His ways. Well, people relations are always the most complicated stuff in life, isn't it true?
I've also came to terms with myself that I can get pretty ugly when I am very upset or disturbed by people's words and actions. Well, for those who thinks that Tricia aka Yanz is very kind and compassionate, always willing to help... etc (puiz... wanna vomit liaoz...) I have a lousy temperament. Yes, I will declare it loud, again and again. Though after I came to know Christ, I have toned down by almost 60% but I still hold the 40% in me and I need to learn to tame this 40% of temper in me. I know myself very well that if I flare up at some situations, it will be very "Yanz", which all my close childhood friends know of me very well. But if I control my temper and anger, it will be very "Christ", the Christ who lives in me and the Christ who cares for me to love me. Many a times, I know that Christ helped me in my character flaws, to build flaws into strengths.
And I am still a WIP (Work-In-Progress) and I know that God will definitely forgive me even after I get angry or show my frustration for the thousand times. And I will call that "Grace".
Lord, thank you for 2006 and thank you for your ever-sufficient grace.