Thursday, April 05, 2012

Faith, faith, where art thou?

Yup, nothing short to say that I am searching for faith now. The faith that I used to have and grow with as a young believer, to a shepherd, to a leader. So where is my faith now?

It makes me ponder how and why did I possess such great faith last time. Did I really lose my faith?

But hold on! I don't think that I have lost it! It is just that I have not been displaying it. By not displaying it is not a healthy sign but I am slowly showing it off again. :)

When I thought that my faith came from people around me, people who constantly feed me the Word of God, teachings, shepherding etc... But truely speaking, we all know that faith comes from hearing the Word (Romans 10:17) and I know that I have not had enough of God's word.

The time that God really spoke so loudly to me was when I heard Rev Marty Blackwelder's message last Sunday that I can't help but to feel ashame of my spiritual walk with Christ. Being a believer in Christ for the past 16 years, I have not even gotten my fundamentals correct - Spending time with my Creator. I am not comparing this with anyone else but to look back at my life, how God has graciously walked with me despite the fact that I have not been a faithful follower.

Yet, He used me. Yes, He chose me.

God's grace is never OOS (out of stock) and will always be full and abundant, never even require any replenishment. The only replenishment is that our soul should draw from Him, the ever flowing river, so that our soul will no longer parch nor thirst.

Ask me if I still love God... Yes I do.

How can I not love Him? He, the ever faithful Father, hears my cry and knows my heartbeat, and eventually answered my prayers - bring my mum to the Lord. This prayer has intensified as I have seen how my mum aged over the years. Though not often prayed out loud, but my tears have represented my prayers for my mum. And this year, my mum has been saved and not only saved, she has received all promises that God has promised! God healed her, restored her and gave her peace, peace that she has never received before in her life.

Everytime my mum shares with me about how she experienced God's healing touch and power, it simply brings me closer back to the Lord. My mum, a 2 months old believer, has experienced Christ more than I could have ever asked for.

My only hope is that I will be able to experience God's power, touch and the Holy Spirit's protection and friendship once more.

If you are dry spiritually, why not you pray to the Lord, just as I did, let God fill your soul once again?

God can do this for not just someone, but for everyone and anyone!

Thank you Lord once again for your inspiration and courage!!

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